ShinRa's Pup
by XIV.XV
Summary: Angeal is not the only person in the world who thinks that Zack is a puppy.


Disclaimer: Things would be very different if I onwed FFVII. . . VERY Different.

By Leash

* * *

Angeal thought that something was off when Zack turned down extra training. Then there were the short, suspicious, conversations on the phone when he called Zack to find out what was wrong. That added another nail in the proverbial coffin. He also thought that something bad was brewing when he saw Zack, Kunsel, and Luxiere all huddled together playing rock-paper-scissors in the middle of the SOLDIER floor, but Angeal _knew_ that something was wrong when Zack lost said game of rock-paper-scissors and punched the air in glee.

"Yes! I win!" Angeal heard as Zack pulled his fist down and somewhat thrust out his pelvis. "This is gonna be awesome! Just you two wait!"

Angeal stayed back and watched as Luxiere and Kunsel snickered at Zack.

"Yes you did," Kunsel goaded, his voice brimming with sarcasm. "You sure did beat us. What a shame! I really would prefer to not make it. Wearing it would be so much better!"

"Well that's what the both of you get for choosing paper all the time!" Zack somehow got out while squatting excitedly. "Now you and Lux have to make the damn thing! Ha! Good luck!"

Being too curious, something of which was most likely not for his own good, Angeal stepped forward to find out what was going on with his three SOLDIERs Second Class. Luxiere and Kunsel immediately jumped to attention, but Zack's back was turned to him and he was too excited to focus any attention on his surrounds at all. With Zack's attention elsewhere, Angeal smirked and decided to give him a quick lesson which consisted of walking up behind him and waiting until he was at the lowest point in his squat, reaching out with his foot, and lightly pushing on Zack's lower back. This caused Zack to more or less face plant into the floor with his behind high in the air.

"How many times do I have to tell you, Zack?" Angeal chucked. "Fraternization between comrades is looked down upon and to stop propositioning me for sexual favors."

It was times like this that Angeal wished he carried his father's camera with him everywhere he went. The looks on the SOLDIERs' faces was priceless. Angeal did not think that Kunsel's and Luxiere's eyes could come any further out of their sockets, and he had never seen Zack a darker shade of red, still, and quiet for so long as he thoroughly processed what was said to him.

"At ease, boys. I'm not here for you," Angeal said to the two at attention. "I've come looking for my lost pup, so if you'll excuse me, you two are free to go."

Luxiere and Kunsel both saluted and turned to Zack.

"Good luck," Luxiere said. "You're gonna need it."

Kunsel shook his head and followed Luxiere as he left. Zack finally pushed himself to where he was resting on his knees.

"You had better do a good job on it! It had better be perfect!" Zack called after them and then turned to look up at Angeal. "What's up?"

Angeal had to shake his head and looked away. Zack looked every bit of the puppy that Angeal had fondly dubbed him as he sat there with his hands resting on the ground between his knees looking up at Angeal expectedly.

"You weren't paying attention to your surroundings." Angeal replied.

Zack chuckled and scratched the back of his head. "Yeah well, um, I was . . . distracted?"

Zack smiled up at Angeal hoping that his answer would pass.

"Get up off the floor," Angeal said as he began to walk away. Zack quickly jumped up and bounded after Angeal to follow him, where ever he would go it seemed.

Glancing over his shoulder to see if Zack was still following and did not get distracted by something pretty, like a girl or even his own reflection, Angeal finally decided to find out what his young protégé was up to. "What was the meaning to all of that?"

Zack paused for a split second in his gait. "The meaning of what?"

"The game you, Kunsel, and Luxiere were playing."

"Oh! It's called rock-paper-scissors. You play when you want t—"

"I know what it is, Zack. My question is why you were playing it?"

Zack chuckled sheepishly. "Because we wanted to?"

"Do not try to skirt the truth, Zack. I asked you a question and I expect an answer."

"Well . . . Um . . . You see . . ." Zack struggled to come up with an answer. Angeal just sighed and shook his head.

"You need to remember your honor as a SOLDIER, Zack, and lying is not an honorable thing to do. Neither is withholding the truth."

"But what if I'm not ready to tell you yet?!" Zack more or less barked out. He was getting really desperate and was trying anything he could think of because he knew that Angeal would not have any of what Zack and his friends were doing.

It worked.

Angeal sighed and shook his head. "Even though I think that I should make you tell me because of the way that you have been acting, I'll place my trust in you and hope that you will tell me when you are ready. Remember, we are inducting new recruits into our ranks and the ceremony is in a month. I expect you to be there and on your best behavior throughout the entire service."

Zack's smile, if possible, grew larger than ever. "Oh, you can trust me. I'll be there and I'll be really good."

The tone in Zack's voice told Angeal that Zack could not be trusted, but he shook it off. What was the worst that he could do? Angeal decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and not push the subject any further.



It was late, past 'lights out' late, and yet Kunsel and Luxiere had to gather up all of the parts and somehow get over to Zack's apartment without getting caught. The latter was easy, usually. The problem was that they had to get everything around and in the bag without squishing it, get out the door and to their destination without looking too terribly suspicious. The entire process was easier said than done with small duffle bags packed to bulging with the outfit.

None the less, they succeeded in the first part of their task and made it to the apartment.

"Lux, what was the knock that Zack told us to do?"

"Shit! I forget! I think that it was something like this," Luxiere raised his hand to the door and proceeded to punctuate every word with a knock. "Knock. Knock-knock. Knock-knock-knock. Knock-knock. Knock."

They waited and heard nothing. Kunsel was about to repeat the sequence again when the door opened a bit. Luxiere and Kunsel froze as they saw Zack's bright blue eye peek out from the small opening and then quickly shut it again.

"You cannot enter! That was not the correct secret knock." Zack's voice rang out from behind the door.

Luxiere sighed. "I don't remember it! Kunsel, he's not going to let us in!"

"How about I change the knock to me kicking the door in? Would that work for you, Zack?" Kunsel said, ignoring Luxiere.

There was silence for a few seconds, and then the click of the lock was heard and the door swung open.

"Hey guys! Fancy seeing you here!" Zack said with a smile. "C'mon in! Make yourself at home!"

"That's what I thought," Kunsel muttered under his breath as he and Luxiere walked in. Zack peeked both ways down the hall and quickly shut and relocked the door.

"Do you have it? Is it do—"

"We have it right here. Not listen up and don't talk. I don't care how hard this is for you. We need to explain how to put it on and we need to do it quick and then get the Hell outta here."

Zack blinked and nodded. "But—"

"AH! I said 'No talking.' Lux, you first."

Luxiere opened his bag. "These are your hands. Put them on like gloves and use the Velcro to tighten them. They need to be really tight because you are going to be waving your hands around like crazy. These are your feet. They should fit over your boots. Once again, here's the Velcro in the back, and make sure that they are tight. Finally, these: It's on a girly head band but your hair should cover that up. It should look as if they are real if you do it right."

Zack blinked looking at the stuff and grinned.

"But that's not all!" Kunsel announced as he opened his own bag and pulled more things out. "You need to tie this around your face. It covers from half way up your nose to your chin. We've tested it, and you should be able to breathe and talk just fine with this thing on. Finally, this stuff: We have black and white. Before you put it on, draw a circle around one of your eyes with a pen. Everything outside of that circle needs to be black and the inside needs to be white. It would also be better if the circle wasn't perfect. Make it come down on the top of your cheek some, but not too far! And also, make sure that it is smooth and even. Understood?"

Zack blinked at his two friends, and nodded numbly.

"Good!" Kunsel said and dropped things on Zack's table. "Have fun!"

Luxiere chuckled and placed his things next to Kunsel's. "And we will be seeing you at the ceremony tomorrow! Don't be late."

With that the two left, and laughed about how quick they were, the look on Zack's face, and what was going to happen tomorrow.



Angeal had a really bad feeling. Zack should have been here at the Shin-Ra auditorium by now, but he was nowhere to be seen. The ceremony was about to begin, and Angeal was really beginning to worry. He also knew that Genesis and Sephiroth were going to be watching and critiquing both Zack and himself, but as time ticked on, Zack did not show, and the ceremony began.

Everything was going smoothly, until the microphone died right after the opening speech.

The lights suddenly went low and a new voice came over the speakers.

"Now, after that wonderful speech by our very own SOLDIER First Class, Angeal Hewley, please put your hands together and give a warm and rowdy welcome to our first ever SOLDIER mascot, Shin-Ra's Pup!"

The doors flew open in the back and everyone turned. Angeal had finally found Zack.

Zack began to make his way down the aisle high-fiving and jumping the entire way down. Everyone was cheering. Even Angeal had to admit that the outfit was awfully clever.

The first thing that Angeal noticed was that there were two puppy ears perched atop his head that flopped around no matter how he moved. Then, his face was painted black and he had a horrible white circle painted around his right eye. With all of the excitement, his eyes shone even brighter than normal. There was a dog snout tied around his face. The mouth was opened, and there was a bright red tongue that hung out and also flopped around. Over his hands were giant paws that he happily waved around, and there were also paws over his feet to that he showed off happily. Everyone was laughing and cheering. Angeal even looked up at the balcony where the other two generals were and saw that they both were at least somewhat amused.

Zack eventually made it on the stage. He ran a few circles around Angeal, who was standing at the podium, and then pounced and proceeded to lick Angeal's face. He was just glad that the tongue was not wet. Before Angeal could capture him, Zack pushed him away and grabbed the microphone.

"How is everyone doing here?" He yelled, and everyone cheered in response. Zack waved his arms around and even danced at little. "That's great. You guys are great. It's GREAT to be here!"

Once again everyone cheered, which only encouraged Zack more. "I love it here! It's so awesome! And I have my best pal here, Angeal! Man he's the best! So c'mon everyone give it up for 'im! ANGEAL! ANGEAL! ANGEAL!"

The entire auditorium began to chant his name. Blushing, but only slightly, Angeal shook his head. All he needed to see was how much Zack's eyes shone to know how big his smile was under that mask. He decided to let Zack have his fun, for now.

"And what are we here for?" Zack yelled once the chanting died down a bit.

"SOLDIER!" The audience yelled back.

"YEAH! BUT WHAT CLASS DO WE WANNA BE?" Zack all but screamed.

"FIRST CLASS! FIRST CLASS! FIRST CLASS!" More chanting began.

Angeal, for what seemed that the millionth time that month, shook his head at Zack and walked over to him. Before Zack could respond in any way, Angeal grabbed the back of Zack's shirt, the part that, if he was really a puppy, would have been the back of his neck, and lifted it high. Zack let out a very loud yelp and everyone laughed. Angeal then took the microphone from him.

"Why doesn't everyone give Shin-Ra's Pup one final round of applause. He's off to the vet to get neutered now, so you won't be seeing him for a while!" Angeal said and grinned, what Zack would call evilly, at him. Everyone laughed again and Zack quickly covered himself.

Just as Angeal was about shoo him off stage, the doors opened again, and two people came in wearing what looked to be dog catcher outfits.

"There he is, Fred!"

"We had better catch him, Bob!"

The two ran down the aisle and Angeal let go of the struggling Zack. There was a rather amusing chase in which the pursuers caught each other, and audience members, rather than Zack, who proceeded to laugh manically whenever that happened. Eventually though, Zack ran from the auditorium and the dog catchers followed. Everyone quieted down and turned to Angeal.

He righted the microphone and cleared his throat. "Now, please, let's continue."

The rest of the ceremony went on without a hitch.



It was not until much later after the ceremony that Angeal found Zack. He was in an empty training room going through a few basic routines. Angeal was actually glad that he found Zack here because he has been trying to find a way to punish the boy since he was late, and seeing him here gave him one idea that might actually get through to him.

Smirking, Angeal charged Zack and caught him completely off guard. With a few well placed light punches, Angeal had Zack on his back and his sword had flown out of his hands.

Without so much as a sound, Angeal walked over, picked up the sword, and began to walk out.

"Hey! That's mine!" Zack jumped up and ran after Angeal. "I know that I should have been expecting you, but can I please have my sword back?"

"No."

"Zack blinked and jumped back. "Why not?"

"Because," Angeal said and gave Zack a sly smile over his shoulder. "You are now on vacation for the next week. You are to stay in your apartment, have friends over, go out, and do whatever you really want to for the next week. You can do anything, besides train. You, for the next week, are not permitted to do anything that constitutes as training. No running, hardly any walking, you have to eat junk food every day, and no squats. I want you to take it easy, especially after today."

At first, it sounded good to Zack, but there had to be a catch. Then it dawned on him. "If I don't train, then I can't get any better! I have to train!"

Angeal chuckled and shook his head. "Not for this next week. Maybe this'll teach you to behave better in the future. From now on, you will be punished, not with extra training, but the lack of training. I'll be keeping tabs on you, so don't try anything. Have fun, Shin-Ra's Pup."

Angeal left chuckling to himself as Zack stood there, completely dumbfounded and shocked.

Zack could only come to one conclusion: "This is going to suck!"

End.

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